Anxiety in children often shows up quietly—hesitation, clinging, tears at goodbyes, an upset tummy before school, or a fear that doesn’t seem to match the situation. If your child seems to worry more than most, you’re not alone. And most importantly, you’re not doing anything wrong.
Some children are simply more sensitive to the world around them. They feel things deeply, think ahead, and often imagine “what ifs.” While this can be challenging, it’s also part of what makes them kind, thoughtful, and compassionate.
With your love and patience, your anxious child can build the tools they need to feel safe, strong, and understood.
First, Reassure Yourself
Children are meant to look to us for safety. If your child clings to you, cries when faced with something new, or needs a little extra encouragement, it’s not a sign you’ve failed—it’s a sign they trust you to help them through big feelings.
Anxiety is common in children, especially during transitions (starting nursery, school changes, a new sibling, etc.) and it’s not always something that needs to be “fixed”—it just needs to be understood and supported.
How Anxiety Often Sounds in Kids
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“But what if you’re not there?”
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“I don’t want to go.”
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“My tummy hurts.”
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“Can I stay with you?”
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“What if something bad happens?”
These are real worries in their world, even if they sound small or irrational to us. The goal isn’t to dismiss their fears, but to walk with them through it.
Tips to Gently Support an Anxious Child
1. Name the Feeling
Help them understand what’s happening.
“It sounds like you're feeling worried right now. That’s okay. Worries are like little clouds—they pass.”
Putting a name to a big feeling gives it less power.
2. Stay Calm Yourself
Even when their fear feels illogical, your steady presence is powerful.
“You’re safe. I’m here. We’ll get through this together.”
Your calm becomes their calm.
3. Create Predictability
Routines, countdowns, and visual schedules help reduce fear of the unknown. Try:
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Morning charts
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Timers for transitions
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A simple "first, then" routine: First we put on shoes, then we go to the park.
4. Practice Brave Moments in Small Steps
Gently stretch their comfort zone without forcing it.
“Let’s try it together first. Then you can try it on your own for one minute.”
Celebrate every small win—they matter.
5. Offer a Comfort Object or Strategy
Whether it’s a familiar toy, a bracelet you both touch when apart, or a phrase they can say to themselves (like “I can do hard things”), having something to anchor to helps.
6. Make Time for Connection
More than anything, your child needs to feel seen, heard, and not rushed. A few minutes of connection before a transition can go a long way.
“Before we go, let’s sit and snuggle for a minute. I love this time with you.”
7. Use Gentle Storytelling
Books about bravery or worry can help externalise anxiety and make it easier to talk about. Try:
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Ruby Finds a Worry by Tom Percival
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The Huge Bag of Worries by Virginia Ironside
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What to Do When You Worry Too Much by Dawn Huebner (great for older toddlers and preschoolers)
A Final Word: You Are Enough
If your child is anxious, what they need most is you. Not a perfect script or magic solution—but your patience, your comfort, and your love.
They may not always say it, but your steady presence is helping build their courage—one small moment at a time.
And when they do face the things they once feared, when they take that brave step forward (even if it’s tiny), you’ll know: you were the safe space that made it possible.
You’ve got this. And so do they.
